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A Surprising Trick That Will Get Your Toddler to Listen Better

 

 

My husband and I used to joke that the background noise of our life was my daughter’s whining. The toddler years for me were no easy feat.

And I knew deep down there had to be another way.

With all my years in teaching and my degree in primary education, Nothing prepared me for my toddler’s antics.

Here is one amazing tip to get your toddler listening.

What I like to call a parenting game-changer.

Have you ever found yourself arguing with your toddler? I know I did. I found myself exhausted. Worn out and in this endless power-struggle.

  • Her peas were touching the fish fingers.
  • She wanted to have the pink cup, even though we left it at grandmas.
  • She wanted me to push her high in the swing… BUT she didn’t want to go fast. (Got to love your toddler’s logic!)

And you know what I found myself doing in response…

Using my adult logic to change my daughter’s behaviour. Trying to explain to my illogical toddler. And her listening ears would go out the window.

Do you want more examples of just what to say to gain willing cooperation? Check out my free eCourse. I’ll take you from wild kids to listeners’ in a few days. Click here to sign up

Where was I going wrong?

I was replying to my daughter as if she understood my logic and reasoning. I thought that if she just could understand WHY then she COULD change her ways.. and not throw a fit over something so ridiculous.

An important piece of information.

A toddler’s brain is not the same as an adult brain, Yes! our brains are not fully developed till mid-twenties.

In short, they just don’t think like us, They are:

  • Driven by their emotional brain.
  • Live in the moment.
  • Don’t have adult logic and reasoning.

They don’t understand you can’t go slow in a swing and high at the same time. I mean, they TRULY believe Father Christmas can fly around the world in one night delivering presents.

What to do.

 Using  Language of Listening® The 3-step coaching model I use, always starts with one thing  “Say What You See®”

Without questions, judgement, fixing or teaching.

Focus on WHAT is going on for your child at the moment, even if it doesn’t make any sense for you.

  • “You wish your peas were on the other side of your plate.”
  • “Oh Boy! You really want that cup… and we left it at Grandmas.”
  • “Oh sweetie, you’re scared going so fast on the swing AND you want to go high.”

In other words. Acknowledge.

Regardless, how absurd or reactive your child is being, the first step is to acknowledge.

ACKNOWLEDGE what they are doing, saying, feeling, thinking.

The reason this step works like a charm is that a child who feels understood is NOW ready to listen.

When I changed how I responded to my daughter, I asked her why she started to listen to me.

“Because you get me, mummy, you understand me.”

Go figure!

A child who feels understood, however illogical, is then ready to listen to you.

Give it a try and be sure to let me know how you get on.

OTHER POSTS YOU MIGHT LIKE

  • How do I get my kids to listen without yelling, threats or bribes?
  • How do I stop my toddler having a tantrum in public?
  • How to best deal with your toddler not sharing

Want to know an easy parenting strategy that really works?

FREE DOWNLOAD - 'HOW TO GET YOUR KIDS TO LISTEN'

It's so simple, yet works like magic, you'll be left wondering "Why did no-one ever tell me this before?" Imagine...
  • No more shouting out of pure frustration
  • No more bribing or threatening just do get your kids to do as you ask
  • No more power struggles and stress
YES, PLEASE

FREE DOWNLOAD 

 

Hi I’m Camilla!

I support parents to restore harmony to their household and fun to their family life.  

I have a teen and a nearly teen and I know just what it’s like to navigate the trials and tribulations of parenting. 

Dive into the large collection of blog posts for free parenting guidance.

“The more that you read, the more things you will know. The more that you learn, the more places you’ll go.”― Dr. Seuss, I Can Read With My Eyes Shut!

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It will give you a simple yet powerful way to gain the willing cooperation you’re after. 

Imagine:

  • No more shouting out of pure frustration
  • No more bribing or threatening just to get your kids to do as you ask
  • No more power struggles and stress

Sign up

3 Language of Listening® Printable Phrase Booklets

You just want to know what to say or do…RIGHT NOW!!!

Page by page you’ll find HUNDREDS of examples of EXACTLY what to say to your child in MOMENTS YOU FACE EVERYDAY. SAY WHAT YOU SEE®, STRENGTHs, and CAN DOs.

FIND OUT MORE
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Get In Touch

  • 07958 941 802
  • camilla@keepingyourcoolparenting.com

Keeping Your Cool

Parenting