One tip to change everything and bring joy back to shopping. “We are not buying anything else.” Sophie reminded her children. “We are only popping into one shop and we’re only getting a present for Daddy.” And just like clockwork, both kids were wanting. “Look at this Mummeeeee. I neeed thissss!!!” Sophie was frustrated. How many times had she told her children they couldn’t always have what they wanted? “How many times do I have to tell you?! We’re not getting anything else; you’re sounding spoilt and ungrateful.” But it always fell on deaf ears. Nothing changed.

You are not responsible for other people’s emotions and they are not responsible for yours. One of the greatest illusions is that you cause other people’s emotions and they cause yours. Think about it. Isn’t this what most of us have been led to believe? It’s modelled through daily interactions and how people typically relate to others. How often have you heard people say: “You’re making mummy sad?” “You’re making me really mad right now!” Because we’ve been told that others are the cause of our reactions and emotions. The craziness of this outlook is that truly we are the ONLY people responsible for our own emotions and reactions. AND we are not responsible for the emotions of others, including our children! It doesn’t mean we aren’t responsible parents, that we should make our child’s life difficult or that we don’t care for their emotional well-being. It means we are not responsible for their emotions and reactions.

        “Just be good!” my husband told our 5-year-old girl as she was messing around in the bathroom, singing, jumping, being silly…. Anything to NOT get in the bath. And not an uncommon thing for a parent to say.  Easily said and quickly forgotten.

    What every parent needs to know when their child is acting up. Her cheeks red, kicking out at anyone who dared come close. “You can’t make me…” she howled. And she was right! This was my life and my daughter’s defiance, rudeness and disrespect were pushing my buttons. No. End.